CHRISTIAN SINGLE’S GUIDE TO PERSONALITY DISORDERS
WHICH CAUSE DEPRESSION FOR BOTH THE PERPETRATOR AND THEIR VICTIMS
Chapter 24. Narcissism: “I Love Me, I Love Me Not”
How Does Narcissism Begin? Nature or Nurture?
That’s the point that Dr. M. Scott Peck makes in his fascinating
book, “People of The Lie; The hope For Healing Human Evil.” Doctor
Peck, a Christian, broke new ground in 1983 with his best selling book
uncovering the role evil plays in personality disorders, primarily
describing narcissism. His premise: narcissists are living a lie. They
lie to themselves and others, carefully cultivating a false front to
hide their brutal and strangely odd, vicious tirades, especially those
involving their helpless children. One hair-raising account is about a
patient, a teenage boy, who was very troubled and depressed. His
brother, one year older, had shot and killed himself with a rifle
their parents had given him. Later, astonishingly, they gave the same
rifle to the younger brother, Dr. Peck’s patient. It gave me goose
bumps when it was revealed that the parents could see nothing wrong
with passing on the suicide weapon their younger son knew had been his
brother’s, instead of buying him a more appropriate gift. But,
Christian singles, this is what I mean when I say that the narcissist
has no empathy for anyone, not even their own children. This family
appeared to be like any family who might live down the street from me
or you, but they couldn’t see what could be wrong with saving some
money on a Christmas gift, and giving the suffering boy the very gun
that his brother used to kill himself. Of course, as his story
unfolded, we could see that the boys had been raised by very evil
parents who loved neither of them. The parents gave the appearance of
being normal, hardworking people, they went to church, but obviously,
didn’t have the love of Jesus in them. But they lacked empathy, any
understanding for what their sons were going through, and they did not
see that their parenting had anything to do with their sons’
depression. Normal human beings will react to a suicide in the family
with the question, “What did I do wrong?” Didn’t I show enough
love and interest in him?“ “Why didn’t I see the signs?’’
But these evil parents never thought for a moment that they could be
the cause of their sons’ anguish. The boys’ childhood was not
mentioned, but it’s a safe bet that this mother and father were
distant from the start. They were too busy playing their role as a
normal, happy family to bother themselves with their sons’ emotional
needs. This example shows the extent to which the narcissist is out of
touch with others. They simply lack empathy for others.
